Yesterday was the weekly weigh-in and I can reveal that I have lost a staggering one pound and ten ounces – IN ONE WEEK!! WHOOOO! YEAH!! ALRIGHT!! (SOUND OF STUDIO AUDIENCE CLAPPING WIDELY).
I’d like to thank God, my parents, my wife, my children, Bella the dog, everyone who has been there for me (STARTS CRYING), the lady on the salad counter at Sainsbury’s, I’d like to thank salad itself, water too, (THAT’S ENOUGH THANK-YOU’S, THANK YOU – Ed)